YTA

Hello my name is Eden and I am a You Tube Junkee. Before you judge me let me explain:

Reason 1: Barats and Bereta - It all started with their Happy Mother's day video and went down hill from there.

Reason 2: two words: Alex Trebek

Reason 3: That one video with the guy who hates Americans and their subtitles

Reason 4: Random foreign music videos

Reason 5: Hollywood's power over me

Reason 6: Great videos people I have met have placed online.

To my family and friends: I apologize if my addiction has harmed you in any way in the past. I will try and get over this.

And they’ll know we are Christians…

I am sitting in the Atlanta airport nearing the end of a 5 hour wait there for my flight back home. I am bored.

Next to me a woman is quizzing her son on Bible trivia, apparently for some competition in Wichita. After a while they stop. The boy picks his nose. He looks about 17 years old. He picks up “Boy’s Life” magazine from his carry-on luggage and begins to read jokes.

Bible Quiz Boy: Hey, do you want to know where I get all my funny jokes? This magazine here (holds up “Boy’s Life” magazine). How do you keep a bull from charging?

Mother: Do you need to go to the bathroom?

Bible Quiz Boy: How do you keep a bull from charging?

Mother: You had better go to the bathroom, it’s going to be a long flight.

Bible Quiz Boy: (pauses) … How do you keep a bull from charging?

Mother: Take away his credit card?

Bible Quiz Boy: (disappointed look)

Mother: Am I right?

Bible Quiz Boy: (doesn’t respond)

As we waited for luggage at the Wichita airport, I quickly took a photo of Bible Quiz Boy. Just as I pushed the button, he swung his drink up and took a quick swig – just like Napoleon Dynamite. Yessssssssssss.

A rare shot of Bible Quiz boy alongside a random cowgirl.

3 Posts for the Price of 1!

First an announcement: Hey, did you all know that Caroline Fisher (Peak) started a blog? She has already produced two posts in which she blames me for things and talks about her new baby. So check it out if you know her.

Second a photograph: of the new staff members at the school in which I will be teaching (the older man in the photograph is the director, not a new staff member) (and the llama...I am not certain of what he is doing in the photo).

We are sitting in the home office where all the behind the scenes work is done for the International schools.

Third the Best Quotes of this week:

The things we are learning keep on coming up in our conversations:

Allison: Look at us. We just went to an All American Baseball game and now are eating American food at an All American restaurant.

Karen: Hey, it’s like what we have been learning about. You know, when the speaker talked about how we will go through an overseas grieving process and we will want to do things from our own country? We must be starting our grieving as we are eating all the things we are going to miss in the United States.

Everyone pauses in contemplation.

Elizabeth: (takes a sip of her chocolate malt and smiles) I like grieving.

All week long we heard that one of the speakers here would give a talk on "sexual purity" - always an enjoyable and non-awkward thing to listen to. Anyway, one of the speakers shared about how women are attracted to godly men. After the presentation, a guy approached a group of us girls saying, “Hey, any of you ladies wanna go to sonic? We can pray afterward.”

I would use the words "Southern" and "Hospitality" to describe the staff who serve us food here, though many aren't used to their kind. I overheard this short conversation as the staff left the kitchen and a group of young training participants were still sitting around.

Older person: Well, we’ll see all y’all young people later.

Younger person: We will see all of you old people later.

Naughty or Nice?

Dear Mom and Dad,

I am having so much fun here at Pre Field Orientation. We can swim, play games and I am making lots of friends.

Also, I am getting to know my future colleagues and they are getting to know me through personality tests and just through conversation:

Lauren: So we were on the roof of the Peabody hotel and Jessica leaned over the ledge to take a picture.

Rebecca: Yes, she was being so...dangerous. No, that’s not the word I want to use. Not dangerous…

Lauren: Risky?

Rebecca: No not exactly risky…

Debbie: risk taking?

Rebecca: Maybe…

Eden: stupid?

Here everyone was like, “Whoa." "What?! No!” “Eden, I thought you were nice!” “I am going to tell the director on you.” (Actually I think that’s the fifth time someone has said something to the equivalent of “I am going to tell the director on you” to me this week).

Sometimes I am nice, sometimes, people just have it coming.

Have a NICE week,

Eden

Quote of the Week

“We don’t throw food here.”
-The first words the director of all the International Schools program spoke to me.

(Right now I am in Mississippi training for my overseas teaching job with all the other new teachers. We are in a school/church/schurch where we do get internet!)

Best Quotes of the Week

At cousin Samuel’s country wedding:
Eden: Where can we eat our food at?
Leah (Duncan): We could go sit on the hay bale.
Joel: On the hay bale or hay Ba-al?

“Every teacher has this book. Its like…the book that every teacher has.”
-Me

“Our parents were so cheap, we would all get in the rides at the department stores and instead of putting a quarter in our parents would shake the machine.”
-Joel

Photo's from the country wedding:




The Hay Baals








My cheap Parents







A cowboy





And I wouldn't be a true Christian if I did not post a verse on my blog every now and then:

"How can you say, 'I am not defiled; I have not run after the hay Baals'?
-Jeremiah 2: 23 - from the NYV (New Yokel Version) study bible.

"P"eru

As most our family was home this morning - a rare thing in the summer - mother decided to have a family meeting concerning our schedule this summer.

The photographs show well what occurred in the meeting.

Mom: I have written here in my date-book "Eden and Dale P." Do either of you know what I meant by that?

Dale: What day did you write that on?

Mom: The 14th of July.

Dale: Oh, you must have meant Eden and Dale Peru – meaning that is the day we leave for Peru.

Joel: (initiates his inner little-boy-humor and destroys the business-like atmosphere of the meeting) Hehe – Eden and Dale p. Why not just write down Peru?

Me: Yeah. This summer Dale and I are going to P!

Joel, Grace, and I: (laughter)

Mom, Dad, and Dale: (ignore us and continue to plan)

Eden: We are going to P on the 14th be exact.

Joel, Grace, and I: (more laughter)

Eden and the City

Today mom and I had time to kill in Wichita, so we went to AmVets, our favorite thrift store (look to the right to see the "National Commander" of Am Vets). Unfortunately, we (and a black woman* who had also just arrived) soon discovered that the store was not yet open and the three of us sat on a bench facing a semi-busy street in downtown Wichita. Then a strange thing happened. A man who had stopped at a red light all the way across the street rolled down his car window and yelled our way:

Random man: “Hey! Aren’t you that one girl from Sex and the City? I saw you on TV the other night!”

Mom: Well, he isn’t talking about me.

Black woman*: I know he isn’t talking about me.

Me: (nervously) What is Sex and the City?

So I guess I look like a Lady-of-the-Evening?

*I hope that my father will understand that I do not mean to use the descriptive word to encourage people to prize their skin color rather than their character, I merely mean to use the word to enhance my description of the day's occurrences.

Letter from Home II

Dear Ma,
We are having a great week HOME ALONE!Hope you are having an awesome time!
Love Eden Dale and Pa



P.S. We also did some of the things that we actually usually do. Like

eating cereal

brushing our teeth in excitement

and blogging with creepy looks on our faces.

For Better?... or For Worse?

These last weeks have been full of organizing and cleaning for me as this will likely be my last month of living at home for a long time. As I was cleaning I found some old comic strips that Joel and I "improved." To see the words clearly, click on the comic strip and the internet will magically bigify it for you.

Letter from Home

This week, as my mother is cooking at camp and as my other siblings are either working at camp or in Topeka, Dale, Daddy, and I will be home alone!
Last year, it was the other way around. Dale and I cooked while our mom was at home and she sent us the following email and included photos of her time away from us:

Dear Eden and Dale
I am having a great week! I am PUMPED [inside joke]. Hope you are having an
AWESOME [inside joke] time.
love ma

Dale and I are going to think of an even more AWESOME email to send to her while she is away - I will be sure to post it!

"Those tapeworms get you every time." –Dale Page

So last night I interviewed with the International Christian School of Lima and it went terribly wrong - here is an excerpt:

Principal: Who would you say are your missionary heroes?
Me: I have always enjoyed the story of Bruchko.
Principal: Oh yes, I have read that! What about the story did you like?
Me: (rambling nervously) I always looked up to how he was willing to do something that was extremely uncomfortable for him because it was what God wanted him to do plus there is that part about the tape worm that is pretty cool. What am I thinking! Why did I bring up the part about tapeworms!
Principal: Huh?
Me: Oh, I was just remembering a part of the story - it isn't important.
Principal: No really, which part was that?
Me: OH NO he won't let me off! Well, there was a gruesome story in the book about the tape worm which Bruce decides to cure his hunger with...

After the interview I was thinking: I am so not getting the job!

Well, I just got a phone call and found out they want me anyway!

The school seems like a perfect fit for me as I want to live and get involved in a Spanish-speaking community, work with students and parents of students who have never opened a Bible before, and work with a school that would support my teaching of art!

Look forward to future posts about Peru life - hopefully none involving tape-worms.

Here is a photo of Miraflores - the most upscale district of Lima and the district in which the school is located. I hear that there is a Starbucks there too - one close to the school.

How to make writing a teacher work sample fun!

Right now I have just about completed my “teacher work sample” – a giant boring paper that teachers have to write so they can graduate. As I was reading the “Teacher Work Sample Handbook” (which is a truly fascinating read) I stumbled upon this passage:

“To protect the privacy of the students, do not include any student names in any part of the TWS including references and appendixes. Also use a fictitious name for the actual school in which your TWS was completed.”

Here are a few excerpts from my TWS which show that I for one took the instructions seriously:

Hogwarts High School is a regular school located in an urban community primarily consisting of families of below average socio-economic status (Hogwarts High School Website, 2007).

Mr. Snape’s 8th hour drawing and painting class meets during the last hour of the day. Two of the students in the class are in gifted programs while 2 are in special education programs because of learning disabilities. One of the learning disabled students, Harry, has difficulty vocalizing his needs to authority figures, and sometimes refuses to do his work...

References:
Hogwarts High School Website. (2007). Retrieved March 15, 2008, from http://www.hogwartshighschool.org/usd666.com

I do not get to know which WSU professor gets to grade it, but I do get to know that they will be delightfully surprised.

Oh yes, above is a photo I took of a typical day student teaching in Mr. Snape's drawing and painting class.

Happy Saint Patrick's

Silly White Teacher

At the high school in which I am student teaching, black students are the majority and I am getting too accustomed to hearing their slang. One student in the class has the name KeadRIAN, but the black kids call him KeadRON. One day, the inevitable happened. I recorded what was said below:

Me: Keadrian. Have a seat please.
Keadrian: (has a seat and then when I am not looking gets up again).
Me: Keadron!
(all the black kids laugh)
Jasmine: she call you Kead-RON!
Latisha: Yeah she be talking black!
Me: (quietly) I meant Keadrian.
(they keep laughing)

In the same class we are working on basket weaving...

Me: Hm.. You need to weave your basket tighter, Jasmine
Keadrian: Look at how tight my basket is Miss Page.
Me: Wow, your basket is crazy tight!
(all the black kids laugh at me again)
Jasmine: She say yo basket is “craayzee tight” Keadron.
Latisha: Yeah, she one of us now.

Another basketry conversation:

Me (looking at a student’s basket): So why did you choose to weave a smiley face on your basket?
Jack: Because I’m a happy person I guess.
Me (when the same student starts walking aimlessly around the room): Have a seat.
Jack: Why do you have to enforce the rules?
Me: What would the world be like if no one ever enforced the rules?
Jack (looking dreamily off into the distance): Then I would have two smiley faces on my basket.

Let the search begin

Dale: What CD do you want me to put in Eden?

Me: Lets try one of the hymn CD’s.

(Dale puts in a CD – music plays)

Me: This is awful, the men are singing all preppy.

Mom: Yeah, like they're in some high school boy's glee club.

Dad: It’s better than the urban yodeler hymn CD’s you guys have been listening to.

He has a point. If anyone ever finds a hymn CD that doesn't have the problems we found above, let us know.

It Can Be Arranged

Last weekend, my mom, dad, Joel, and I went up to visit Paul in Topeka at his new home. I laughed when I saw the way he had arranged his furniture. On one side of the room was half the furniture, on the other, the other half – if you want your guests to stare at one another awkwardly I suppose this layout would be alright.

So anyway, mom and I thought we were very wise in rearranging things.

After this, Paul came home with an old K-State friend who, it turns out, claimed he had "already moved around the furniture." Oops.

Root Canal Ravings

“It all started when I was an adolescent girl, too proud and foolish to listen to my dentist’s advice and floss my teeth.” Thus begins Root Canal starring Eden Page and Dr. Meyers. The film was a bit predictable but surprisingly not as painful an experience as last year’s Filling (starring Dr. May and Eden Page). However, the Oscar worthy performance of Dr. Meyers was offset by Eden Page’s less than admiral acting. A slight tearjerker and yet not appealing to the heart, suspenseful but not quite a horror flick, the film fails in all possible ways. The ending of this dull film is as numbing as its beginning – I give it one scar.

Root Canal Part II will make it’s premiere March 6^th. We shall see if Dr. Meyers is able to pull the operation out of the hole it has drilled itself into.

So I found this photo when looking up root canal pictures for this blog entry. Don't look too closely or he will steal your soul.

Dale Ray and Eden Stewart

6:20 Monday – at the house we are sitting

Eden: This bread pudding isn’t done.

Dale: No but it still tastes good.

Eden: Still, it would be better if we stuck it in the oven for about 10 more minutes

Dale: But we have to go to Lynette’s right now!

Eden: No problem, lets just put it back into the oven and turn it off before we go so that it will still be cooking when we go.

7:20 Monday –at Lynette’s Apartment

Dale: (Looks at Eden)

Eden: What?

Dale: Did you turn off the oven?

Eden: (Bursts into tears*)

*not really - I do not have feelings

The window not only took the bird's life, but its very essence.

This is a picture of an image on one of the larger windows of the house that Dale and I are sitting for a few weeks. The owners of the house told us before they left that one day they found the imprint on their window after some poor bird slammed into it. Although the picture doesn't show it, you can actually see its little talons, one of its beady eyes, and even individual feathers.