Got time to kill?

Get the messy murder accomplished with these three Christian groups:

1. Henrietta and Myrna

hint: reading the comments below it while watching it will make the experience less painful

2. Sonseed

peppy and preppy

3. O Holy Night

I am pretty sure this is a recording of Josh Groban when he hit puberty. I know I know, Dale already posted it on her blog but some things take a while to get old.

Peruvian Culture Fact #2

My very first Sunday back in Peru, I was riding my bicycle to the school to complete some work there. Suddenly, a water balloon exploded right in front of my bike tire - it had just missed me. I looked for the culprit, but none could be found.

My friends explained to me that, as February is the hottest month of the year in Peru, it is also a month where it is acceptable for people to get each other wet and play water pranks on one another. It gets rougher in poorer districts where sewage water, paint, and worse are thrown on people. They call this “Carnival” though if it were up to me I would give it another name.

I will keep you informed if I actually do get hit.

Just so you know, super is pronounced "sue - pear" when said in Spanish

My friend Jenna and I are walking around downtown Lima in search of the National Fine Arts School of Peru so that I can enroll in a class. We are lost and Jenna asks someone for directions...

Jenna: Pardon me Señor, do you know where the Escuela de Bellas Artes is?

Señor: I am not sure. …Wait, let me ask my SUPER AMIGO!

Suddenly appears SUPER AMIGO!!! - a man donning a cape, tights, and red underwear! He places his hands on hips and proudly turns to us. His bangs are greased into a tight swirl in the center of his forehead and he has a confident smile!

SUPER AMIGO: Hola, how can I help you?

Jenna: We are looking for the Escuela de Bellas Artes.

SUPER AMIGO: Oh yes! The SUPER ESCUELA DE BELLAS ARTES! You can see SUPER BELLA art and statues and WHATEVER art your heart desires to see. Just go DOWWWWN two blocks, take a RIGHT down to MORE blocks this way, and walk 5 MORE blocks and THEERRREE you will find it!

We told him "gracias" though later I thought back on it and realized that we should have said something more like “You saved the day again SUPER AMIGO!”

Here is a photo of the SUPER ESCUELA DE BELLAS ARTES

"I've got a love emergency" might make a great song lyric

My roommates and I get a lot of catcalls and whistles in Lima and here are the top 5 reasons why:

1. we are white

2. we have light eyes

3. we have light hair

4. because Peruvians are more expressive than Americans

5. because my roommates are good looking

Here are the top 3 oddest catcalls I have received:

1. “Hola Leche” (hey milk) – because I am white, get it?
2. “Hola Arroz” (hey rice) – again, because I am white
3. “Que bo-ni-to An-ge-li-to” (what a pretty angel)

However, today – I got the catcall of all catcalls.

To hear this story, you must first understand that in Peru, when an ambulance is going down the street, they not only have bright flashing lights but also loudspeakers. Oftentimes you will hear a muffled voice say sharply, “Pull off to the side of the road!” and then, if people do not comply, “At this instant! Pull off to the side of the road!” and then, if people still do not comply, “HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU PEOPLE!!! GET OFF THE ROAD!!! THIS IS A LIFE AND DEATH SITUATION! HAVE YOU NO HEART!!!” (ok so I have never actually heard the last loudspeaker saying – but I wouldn’t be surprised if it has been said).

Anyhow, this morning I was riding my bike and stared at the ambulance as it was passing me. Out of the loudspeaker, for all the world to hear, came, “Que bonito los ojos!” (translation: What pretty eyes you have).

Peruvian Culture Fact #1

In Peru, a common phrase is "poco a poco," or "little by little" as that is often how life goes here. It is a short way of saying, "things take time so lets all be patient." I hear it most often used with Americans who are furious when they find that something they wanted done for them by a Peruvian isn't happening in what they believe is reasonable time.

Today, the following usage of the word made my friends and I laugh silently at church today:

Pastor Ramiro (yelling): When you are born again, your life makes a 180 degree turn and its DRAMATIC! You don't say, "I used to be in a relationship with five women - but now that I am born again I am changed - I am in a relationship with only three!" Or... you don't say, "I used to get drunk off of five beers - but now that I am born again I am changed - I only get drunk off of one!"

A soft whine comes from someone sitting behind us: Poco a poco.