You just don't understand this culture

Today, I spent the day with a few other friends and our church's pastor planning for the university group at church. One suggestion was made that we should make sure everyone gets asked if they read this weeks reading and whether or not they read the prayer emails and prayed. "That way," this person said, "each person will be sure to do so the next week for fear of being asked again."

I said in response, “but the only problem with this is that people are going to be acting out of guilt or shame rather than because they actually want to pray for others because they love Christ.”

El Pastor responded with something that surprised me, “but, Eden, I don’t always want to read my Bible, but I depend on the reminders of others to keep me motivated to do it. Guilt and shame are valid ways to get people to act.”

I then responded yet again, “But when I look at my students I see some of them require teachers telling them to do their homework, others need no reminders because they love doing their homework. My goal as a teacher is to teach those who need reminders to love to do their homework just like the others, to teach them to be motivated because of love and not guilt.”

“But my Dear Eden,” responded El Pastor, “This culture is different. No one acts without a consequence. We all need someone to tell us what to do or we are not going to do it.”

Here I stopped. I have learned enough from about Latino culture to know that their culture really is different in this aspect. But I am still not sure if that is an excuse. I want to hear the Pastor say, "this is something I don't like about our culture and we need to change in this aspect." But I need to look up more information before I expect that. And if I do find out that it truly is something wrong, I need to remember that I come from a culture which has its own sin tendencies.

Ahh the beauty of living cross culturally. It opens our eyes and opens our identities so we can plainly see the roots of our sin problems.

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Later, El Pastor talked about me being the head of some English classes we may hold in our community as an outreach. He said to me, “so are you up for being in charge of them?”

I paused and then nodded.

Then he smiled and pretty much told everyone “now watch this” and then turned to me, “I had an American daughter who lived with me for a year and I learned a lot about her ways, including the fact that you all are sure to do something if you have set dates for it. So tell me, what is the beginning date and the end date of the classes which you would want to give?”

I paused and then said, “I don’t know, I have to check my calendar first.”

He laughed, “Of course! Your calendar. All you Americans have your little agendas!”

Oh dear. It seems the culture I so often observe is observing me right back.